Hi French,
Living in fear is miserable. It is where I was when I was at the end of my rope drinking.
My experience in AA has been the opposite. I have a great therapist and I think one would be very beneficial to you if you have that option.
As Tomsteve pointed out feeling imprisoned and living in fear is not part of the program. You mentioned backing off of your meetings and I think that is a great idea. Slow down there and find a new hobby, travel, do things you've always wanted to do. None of us have escaped the prison of alcohol only to feel imprisoned by something else.