well remember, this isn't a competition for who says NO the most!!!
even before the NO, we have to learn how to WAIT to be ASKED for help. i'm ready to hop in the nearest phone booth and don my cape, but i have to remember to be more like Batman and wait for them to the beam the BAT SIGN in the sky FIRST!
then it becomes a very individual process......is what is being asked of you REASONABLE? is it something you have TIME to do? is it something you WANT to do? is it something you would do for anyone who asked, or just THIS person? do you fear any repercussions if you do NOT do as they ask? do you feel plain ole GUILT?
there are no RIGHT WAYS or WRONG WAYS, unless you are not being true to yourself.