your abf is quite deep in his addiction......and to date, you have enabled that process......i doubt that you simply not being as "emotionally involved" is going to serve as his wake up call.
kicking his @ss to the curb probably wouldn't do it either.....but it would sure help YOU out. and see that is where the shift in your thinking needs to continue to progress...........about what is best for YOU. and NOTHING you have shared about this "relationship" sounds good or healthy for you. he is not a fixer up or a home improvement project.
he has shown you repeatedly and quite demonstrably what HE is about.
honey, HE IS MARRIED. he has a child. you can't really accuse him of cheating ON you, as he is cheating WITH you.
what do you hope to happen here???