Thank you @thephoenixrises. Calling the police on someone you love, learning they cheated on you, lied, having to go scoop them up in their own urine, vomit, and feces after they holed up in a hell hole for a week drinking themselves to death, destroying your apartment, verbally abusing you, and then doing it on a regular basis for the last year, all while married to another woman with a child he never sees (separated) and unable to divorce and face responsibility, the addict still becomes frustrated that I am not OK post- binge.
We are so emeshed in what he always professes is the greatest love he's ever known, yet the damage he brings me makes it hard to see the forest for the trees. More so, this sadness in me that he still doesn't understand what he has done. How many opportunities we give the one we love who is incapable of loving us maturely in the way we deserve.