Arpeggioh, I don't want to overwhelm you with stuff. What I would like to do is post a link here. You don't have to go to it now, but it will be on this thread if you ever want to refer back to it.
Alcoholics Anonymous : Alcoholics Anonymous
It's the online version (.pdf) of The Big Book. Look at the "Chapters"...especially Chapter 1. Not now, but maybe later on or when you get a quiet moment. It's a real easy read, and very interesting.
We're all in the gutter together and we can all get out together. I had to get thrown out of my house before I ran across that link. I'm still trying to earn my way back into my house...just hasn't happened quite yet, but I'm getting there.
Anyhoo, you're in good company here. You can ask anything here and someone will answer, guaranteed.
Keep talkin'...........