Welcome to SR!
The only way to make a change is to take one tiny step at a time. I'm hoping for a good sober day for you Benjamin
. If you feel so inclined, I highly recommend going to a meeting of AA; it is not the only way to get or remain sober but, for me, it has been an essential part of remaining sober. I go twice a week to meetings and have over 3.5 years of sobriety now - when I was first trying to get sober I really struggled to think past a day or a week without a drink, but it absolutely is possible.
I wish you the very best
