Plastic it may have been you that told me the same thing. You can live with an addict but not be surprised when they start acting like one.
I am still with my AH and the road has been rough. But I have come to learn that my own choices have consequences as well. I have chosen to live with an addict so I can't be shocked when my home is chaos. I do get mad at myself many times but at any time I can get off the merry go round.
I am working on me and have made progress. GK I will say this. Expecting your AS to pay you back may be setting yourself up for failure. In a perfect world it would get better. But addiction is a progressive disease. Newcomers and oldtimers alike need to know this. Things will and always will get worse if an addict is using. So protect your self and take care.
I hope your AS finds real recovery as it can be amazing