I don't know that the facts will make anyone feel any better about the alimony.
I did not know he was an alcoholic. But central to the breakdown of our marriage was the fact that he refused to look for another job when it became clear that he wouldn't make more than $5-10k a year. We had by then purchased a home under the assumption that he would make at least $40k a year. He always had some excuse for why he couldn't look, the DUI on his record; the stress of infertility etc. He always claimed that being childless was the source of all his stress and unhappiness.
Well finally after so many sessions of IVF I lost count, we were having twins. And I said, "OK, you should be over the moon! Now is the time to look for a job!"
And he said he preferred to "get thru the pregnancy" first. He suggested if I was so materially focused perhaps I should get a second job. (I was an SVP at the time who worked 50-60 hours a week and budgeted so carefully that we only ate meat once a week. I was worried about losing our house. He suggested I had money issues.)
There were other factors at play to be sure but that's when I had my "are you ******* kidding me" reaction and knew the marriage was not salvageable.
That reality was shared in our legal motion, along with the fact that he had a degree from a prestigious university as well as a secondary degree that should have allowed him to easily make six figures - had he not deemed it "too stressful" to practice.
Didn't end up mattering - he got the maximum he could have expected and left the courtroom gloating. The next day I visited the kids at his apartment and remember seeing a bottle of champagne.
It bothers me all the time how much we collectively spend on support payments but my current husband always says he would gladly spend it to be married to each other. He's right of course; we have to be very careful about our spending still, but it's a lot easier when you have a true partner who's committed to working with you and within a budget.