That's weird. I wouldn't call myself sober. I have five days. I'm proud of it and all but this isn't the first time by a long stretch and while I'm grateful I feel like making declarations when I know the monster I'm dealing with around a month or two... Or three weeks.... It just feels like I'm setting myself up.
Today I'm clear. No more, no less. I'm going to be 40 this year and this behavior of drinking too much has been going on for a long time. When I've owned it I will know. But five days? I'm not sober. I'm trying to hold on to a branch I grabbed while falling down a hole. I can get there and I see the path, but getting there is precarious and I'm not announcing that I'm there yet. I joined this site five years ago and right now I'm on day five. Grateful, but realistic.
One thing my addictions do is make me delusional and one thing early sobriety does is make me ride a pink cloud. Nope. Not falling for it this time. I can feel gratitude and experience self awareness at the same time.
I'm a creative person who has a plan to pick up where I left off, when I am healthy enough to do so, because it will help to keep me healthy.
xoxo
B