"I think you are looking at too many "what ifs", "could be", and "don't want". It might be better to take everything day by day- focus on today and only today and then ruts are easier to avoid. Gratitude lists are also helpful- you are two months sober, able to go to therapy, have a wife that is willing to go to counseling and work on your marriage when a lot of people do not have a spouse that is willing, and you even said you are slowly but surely improving.
Although we want things to get perfect over night, it just isn't the way our bodies and minds work. Do you have a recovery plan? Do you follow a recovery program? The more pro-active you are in your recovery the faster you will realize how much gains you are actually making.
YOU CAN DO THIS!"
Wow, this is great advice for all of us. Thanks!