Thank you for all of your input! I didn't realize how much I learned from my mom when it came to codependency until I had moved back in with her after leaving exABF. I saw even more habits I didn't want to pass down to my daughter.
I think its even harder to detach from a codie than it is from an alcoholic. Especially a parent. I am doing my best, but it seems when I try to not react she just tries harder to get me to. It is easier with not being under the same roof though.