This is just about the worst place to come for relationship advice, perhaps second only to AA. AA (the program)doesn't try to give advice on this for two good reasons. Number one we are more experienced at making a mess of things than having successful relationships, and number two, relationships are part of life and as such have no bearing on whether you will get sober or not.
The program is not about perfection. While it may make sense to hold back on any heavy stuff in the first few weeks, while we get on with the steps, there comes a time when the obsession is lifted and it is time to step into the world. That is where we may make mistakes. AA meetings and steps do not prepare a person for a relationship. They are merely part of a program to treat alcoholism.
The preparation for relationships is the same for all human beings. Trial and error, pain and growth. Waiting will not eliminate mistakes, but the AA program will enable us to learn from our mistakes instead of drink over them.
Wife or no wife etc, we simply do not stop drinking while we are depending on other people instead of God, is how the book goes.
When the time is right, God will drop someone right in your lap. It took a bit longer for me than you, but if your relationship with him is right, you can do anything that free men can do, and that includes relationships.