mama you sound like an incredibly strong person. I am so sorry to hear what you and your kids are going through. I don't have much else to add to what everyone else has said - keep coming back and don't be afraid to ask for help and talk to friends and family as much as you need. You and your kids are important and people love and care about you. You have the strength to get through this, and you can and will meet any challenge he throws at you. Stay strong and remember why you're doing this - you're on your way to making a better life for your children and for yourself. Big hugs xx