Maybe you could find an alanon meeting today or tomorrow? Even
if you have to drive further, it would be worth it. The denial in your
life is crumbling and you are seeing maybe for the first time how bad
things really are & it is an extremely emotional time. The discomfort is a blessing because it will propel you to get informed & then make
decisions & a plan.
This forum contains a tremendous amount of wisdom, experience,
& information to help you on your journey. The potential to
change YOUR life for the better is now being offered to you if
you do the work. I am and its still in progress for sure, but I'm
not that far from the days when the wall of denial came crumbling
down.
Keep coming back, this journey is all about you my friend.