I work with one of the most enabling parents I have ever seen. She has 3 children and last year the oldest got a girl pregnant. This is after he dropped out of art college and she had to drive to Georgia to bring him home and then lie to get his tuition money back. The girl already had an 18 month old child, didn't work and was on welfare. So they get married and he quits his job to start his own business. She borrowed all the money to help him get his business started and would then complain that she only had $2.00 in her checking account. She still has 2 children at home, 1 home from college and the other just graduated. Last week she said she had 17 (yes 17) loads of laundry to do. I said "you mean that "R" (18 yo daughter) can't do laundry". She replied, "well, she can but I have to do it a certain way". In her case, I think it's all about the control she feels she has to have over everything. Alrighty then!!! Glad it's not me.