Betty, I'd encourage you to confide in a few close friends. You have nothing to be ashamed of, and you could tap into so much support and good-will.
Think about your future in the long term, because there is a life after divorce. It must be very hard to move on when you see him every day, and even enjoy seeing him. Your arrangement at the moment is probably not going to last forever, and it would be better to make plans proactively rather than just let things coast along. Alcoholism tends to be progressive, and with it can come irrationality and hostility.