I lived with an alcoholic from Aug-14 to Aug-15. I can't help but love her but the drinking and jekyll & hyde persona became too much. After we split she moved away. Roll onto May this year we got back together in a long distance relationship. It was fantastic at first. So much in love again but then her drinking (although much improved) began to affect me. My forehead tightens and feel the need to get away. We live 3hrs apart so the distance is providing the detachment I need and I'm back at al-anon. Why is it that I miss her like mad when we're apart but feel the need to detach when we're together? If only she'd begin her own journey to serenity. Our future doesn't look good right now and feel heartbreak coming up. You're not alone in how you feel about the alcoholic in your life and I send my love to you. Keep posting to get things off your chest. Read the al-anon books and any other related literature. Focus on and take good care of you.