I fantasized about a life without XABF for a long time before I left. It kinda became my mind's 'happy place."
And maybe it's a "The Secret" kinda deal....but for me, when I envisioned it, it eventually became how it was.....and it was just as sweet, if not sweeter than I had imagined. My life and the misery I had with the X seems like a surreal dream, rather than a huge part of my past, and I cannot fathom ever living in that kind of situation again.
A few months after going NC were awful - off and on, but always had an overlaying sense of peace, and the peace is eventually what took over - and now, I will remove people from my life as needed and mercilessly to protect it.
Keep daydreaming - it leads us to action.
(((COD)))