Hi Forourgirls - thanks for your reply - I always enjoy reading your posts
Originally Posted by
Forourgirls 
YES.....YES! I've been subject to all of the above. In fact, my ex mother in law told me I was the reason her baby boy drank-you know bc I was so awful and stressed his poor little soul out so much ( absolutely untrue-her baby boy was just that. A boy who could not and would not live up to his responsibilities if being a man-a husband and father). I was subject to abuse from not only my ex but also his family-extended and immediate. He's told many people absolute lies, things people are starting to realize are lies-and asking me about . Slowly they will see the truth.
One of the hardest parts for me is that unknown to me when I met her, she had a problem with alcohol years before I met her. She had almost died at that time, and her family of origin knew that.
So her family knows damn well that the alcohol problems existed long before I even met her.
And yet somehow the relapse years later when we were together becomes my fault, despite the fact that there were multiple things going on in her life that were causing her stress.
Now, what are you going to do with all this infirnation?!
It has all just been rolling around in my head in the last few months and I am working with a therapist myself now trying to process it.
It has taken me over a year to see the reality of what happened clearly.
When you are in the midst of a situation like that, at the time, surrounded by people who blame you, it is very hard to see the reality.
Part of the reason I have joined the forum is to try to process it all and to try to make sense of a senseless situation, which defies my experience of how a simple bit of commonsense can help a situation.