Originally Posted by
D122y 
Z,
Welcome back.
At 1 week you are beginning to heal physically, the booze has pretty much left your system. Your anxiety ramps up because your brain doesn't have the booze.
It is a death spiral that is hard to pull out of w out some real motivational reason.
I actually decided that I didn't want to solve the problem w booze, but rather get through it naturally.
It has been very difficult to do. Many people need anti depression meds to get by.
Some need them for life. I am drug free, but I suffer here and there daily.
Dealing w the long term anxiety cause bewilderment. This leads to relapse.
Each relapse is worse than the last.
If you have been here before, this might be just a reminder.
Get clean. Change your life a bit. Stay clean.
Thanks for the post.
Thank you for taking the time out to post this.
I actually just came from lunch and being in a small town, I go home at lunchtime. I binged ate so much and I think it's because I'm nervous, scared of messing up again. I ate and ate as much as one possible could in an hour (maybe I'm exaggerating).
Upon going through the cupboards for more food, I found some wine. I did not throw it out right there and then but I will as soon as I finish work.
I have been praying before every sobriety try for God to give me one more chance and I always mess it up. I am really serious about it this time guys. I have 2 small kids who's worlds begin and end with me. Just being faced with that wine a few minutes ago, made me realise what a slave I've become to this habit.