Frick I was sober 2 years then went back out then found SR last August and managed 5 Months so now I'm back and got 14 days .
Maybe I should have included in my post that I have a very painful hip and knee right now , xray was normal on the knee and the doc says the pain is referred from the hip where I have some arthritis so this pain isn't helping my moods .
I take on board all that you guys say . I WILL go on the vacation and I won't drink , as you say there will be many other things to do .
I am more determined than ever before that I will do this right and yes I do remember so vividly the state I was in during that last binge then the nightmare withdrawal .
Its strange because I wasn't so irritated last week but as you say it takes time for the mind to level out , stabilise .
I do have a lot in my life to be grateful for so thanks for pointing me towards the gratitude list .
I'm now at work doing my 12 hour night shift and have calmed down and I'm glad I got that off my chest earlier.
Thank you all