I had a hard time for years accepting the idea that I could never drink. I also felt like the "one day at a time" was just a trick! Because I knew that they really meant forever.
Consider this: go to one or two social events and don't drink - just view it as an experiment. See how it feels. I was surprised by how easy it really was and how I did not feel out of place. And, it was nice to get home sober and even better to wake up without a hangover.
I was told by a nurse/counselor that combining Xanax and alcohol can cause serious memory problems. (not giving medical advice, certainly not telling you what to do, but they don't mix well)
BTW - I'm a runner, too. And it feels a lot better to run without a hangover!