HAF: thank for asking about me.
I just get stressed with everything.
Emails, phone calls, deadlines, staff schedules, payroll, invoices.
Then I leave a place at midnight and I drove home and think " did I shut the water off at that last place? I have to shut the water off for insurance purposes in case of a flood- what if that place floods because I forgot to turn the water off and a pipe bursts?
I should go back even though it's midnight and I have to get up at 6 am- but if I go back I won't get home till 1:30- and I need some sleep because I have work and school."
And when papers are due or exams I nearly lose my grip haha
Drinking would take me from 60-0 in minutes; I still haven't learned to manage my stress yet, so I'm just smoking a lot of cigarettes right now.
Then I'll wake up in the morning and answer emails, make phone calls and deal with everything else that comes up.
I'm getting overwhelmed without the alcohol, but it's manageable.
I'll either need to find some zen state or cut back on work.
But I pay my tuition myself, and I obviously like to travel.
If I cut back on work I'll need to get a loan or stop travelling ( both of which I don't want to do)
I sometimes wish I had a partner to take some of the weight off- even someone who was there to help with laundry, tidy up the house, pay a bill or cook a meal for me like Brain does for his wife when she's busy.
I have to EVERYTHING and I get stressed- I haven't even done dishes in 4 days
Rant over