DD, good to hear from you, but sorry you're feeling depressed.
A few observations:
1. You say you have no friends outside of work. That implies you have friends at work. I personally feel like for a decent social life, you don't need a hundred friends (as Facebook would lead you to believe). All of my friends are through work or from college, then just offshoots of friends those people already have. I think you should just start with your existing work friends and make an effort to chat with other of their friends in social settings to see if you can find some sober friends.
2. Your comment on inflicting yourself on someone else. When it comes to relationship, my depression leads me to think that all the time. It's oretty destructive thinking however. There are people out there for everyone. I'm a rather quirky person, but am doing my best to find a soul mate. Unless you are a violent person/serial killer, you don't need to be thinking that you are inflicting yourself on others.
3. You are correct, the answer certainly isn't at the bottom of a bottle. I had a relapse in March and the few days afterwards were horrific. On top of the standard anxiety/depression I deal with, I was riddled with guilt/shame/embarrassment over my actions when I drank.
Well, this weekend for me has been productive. I caught up on my class work, caught up on some items at work, read over 100 pages of my book club book and am about to file my taxes now. Socially, I've been a bit of a shut-in this weekend, but have two social activities lined up this week. I'm going to the Mets game Tuesday night with a friend of mine who doesn't drink, then around lunchtime next Saturday have the book club meeting. I've been told I have to nominate the next book, so I'm hoping to get this current book finished and then find one to nominate. All the books I've read recently are about baseball or non-fiction finance books (Michael Lewis and similar stuff). So yeah, don't want to nominate those, will find something else I've been meaning to read that has good reviews.