lavitavaavanti

Hi, I'm a 20 year old recovered meth addict. My addiction started two years ago. I was bored with life and got caught up in a lifestyle full of adrenaline. A man I was messing around with got me into the escorting business and it was an escape from reality for me. I met a girl who I became partners in crime with- and we both went spiraling downward together. This girl put me onto meth. I first started snorting it, but when I started smoking it, I started going crazy. I ended up in the hospital and psych ward twice, and I've been sober since my last hospital visit. I moved out of state for a year to start a new life. I cut off all old contacts/everyone I got high with and began to go to church. I got employed and when I moved back to my home state, my employer transferred me. Having cut off everyone that I had contact with is very hard for me, and it's difficult not having an adrenaline rush or living a dangerous life which was I was also addicted to (the danger). I am just struggling with keeping out of contact with my old friends, I make fake profiles to check on them and see what they're doing, wishing I was a part of it, but I am very lonely and desperate for new friends. I don't know where to find friends. I feel like a loser going out of the way to look at my old friend's profiles and accounts and I really do not want to end up talking to them again because it's very tempting and I know I will use again if I come into contact with them. How do I stay away??? How do I create a new life??? Help!!!