Secrets keep you sick
I have been very honest since starting my journey in sobriety. In the wake of the events that happened this weekend, I found myself in an old way of thinking. I panicked and didn't want to hear grief from others and lied to my sponsor and my best friend about where I stayed after the big blowup this weekend. I told my sponsor I stayed at my friend's house and I told my friend I stayed at my sponsors. I stayed here. At ground zero. I am already stressed with a child and tough schedule and just didn't want upset that already delicate balance. My anxiety has been through the roof and I only hurt myself. I have since admitted my wrongdoings and got the slap on the wrist I deserved. My anxiety was lifted.
Part of this healing is the ability to be honest. With yourself and with others. The way I felt after going back to my old ways of lying and manipulating was disgusting. The stress that put me under made me physically ill. Be honest. If you mess up and lie, come clean. It is so much easier to tell the truth. Have a beautiful, sober day.
Jennifer