Originally Posted by
EndGameNYC 
I imagined that this might be the case.
The thing with "exposure therapy" or "systematic desensitization" is that we don't expose ourselves to things that we both fear and crave. It's also done with the supervision and participation of a trained professional, so as not to move too quickly and not to get bogged down with a sense of failure that often comes with moving too slowly.
The idea of exposing myself to experiences that typically are associated with drinking as a plan for recovery doesn't pass the smell test. If you're going to stop doing this because of a consensus against it (which is compliance), rather than due to it being a conviction on your part, then you'll open yourself up to feelings of resentment.
Each time I place myself at risk by being in situations that are associated with my drinking, I reinforce (consciously or otherwise) that behavior, leading me to continue doing the same thing. It's also possible that I could then convince myself that getting sober is "easy," since each time I expose myself to alcohol in an unnatural setting (i.e., with the presence of a supervisor), all goes well. It's easy to see how and where that might go.
Negative reinforcement means getting a reward of sorts by taking something away, as in aspirin taking away a headache or stopping the local bully from go after other children. Positive reinforcement means adding something to the situation in order to make things better. Both of these play a part in getting sober, with the latter focusing on positive action in order to live well in sobriety.
Punishment (which my undergraduate students uniformly confuse with negative reinforcement) is having an undesirable outcome based on what we do. This usually leads us to stop doing whatever we were doing. Usually. Though they were both obvious and extremely painful, the undesirable outcomes of my drinking didn't immediately move me to remove alcohol from my life.
If you want to get healthy, be healthy. If you want to do good, be good. If you want to get sober, be sober.
This was very enlightening. Thanks a lot! At first I did decide to quit doing the exposure therapy because everyone said it was a bad idea. Then I was in doubt about it. What should I do? Continue it because it does feel right or stop it for now? That were my main questions.
Your post made two separate messages come together in my mind and I had my answer. The first message (I'm very sorry to who wrote it, I forgot who it was) contained the observation that alcohol is everywhere. So there's no need to seek it out, not a day goes by that I don't come across anything related to alcohol at least once.
The second message was Dee's. Where he talked about building the sober muscle over time.
Well, all I have to do is live my life and stay sober. Alcohol is everywhere anyway and by staying sober, I will build the sober muscle.
So I'm back to my original plan. I need to go back to the post about making a plan and continue working on it. That's the most important part because that's the key for me to stay sober.
Thanks a lot!