Originally Posted by
Evienne 
I'm just not feeling very proud of myself yet. I never did, but I never did much to warrant pride, or I countered it with something to be terribly ashamed of. If I don't feel proud of getting sober, and helping people, I am afraid I will succumb sometime soon when things get difficult. I have no one near me that pats me on the head for sobriety but you guys. So how would I begin to feel this? Will it come naturally with more sober time and goals achieved?
Welcome back Evienne! I too share your love for horses and dogs (and all animals really)...
Spending SOBER time with my horse has been very therapeutic for me. By that, I mean not hung over, giving only a small part of myself to him...but being there for him fully present and more emotionally "full" for him.
You mentioned concerns about feeling proud of yourself. It is so easy for us to treat ourselves in ways we would NEVER treat a friend (in our negative self-talk, etc.).
I have not felt any self-worth or anything to be proud of for so many years…because of drinking. I can tell you that every day that I wake up sober, I feel an amazing sense of accomplishment and happiness that I am not dealing with the shame of drinking the night before, or not remembering and the list goes on.
The last few Friday’s have been so healing for me…I have spent the witching hours with my horse…just hanging out with him enjoying each other’s company and giving my whole self to spending time with him and not wanting to rush home so I could drink.
I’m finding the more that I make these “good choices”, the better I feel about myself. I hope you hang in there and give the “real” things in your life the attention they deserve and give yourself a chance to feel how wonderful that can be!