M1A1, anyone with long term sobriety will tell you that the first year is hard; each season brings different triggers, as does anniversaries and events. Probably the worst emotion any of us will have to learn to face sober is loss, either in relationships or in death. Don’t beat yourself up for caving in the past few weeks, just try to learn from it and move on. In reality, drinking solves nothing. It may help you to disengage temporarily, but the price paid is far too great for what it provides.
Best wishes to you and your family as you assist your father with his final affairs.