Originally Posted by
BNH34 
I don't know that I should have used the word addicted yet....he abuses drugs and if no one was around to ever stop him or advise him, he would easily fall into addiction.
So you're going to be his pill police/therapist/mom and that will stop him?
Honey, I know you're heartbroken but nothing you can do will fix this and as long as you're "babysitting" to protect him from the consequences of his using, nothing will change...and he will rebel against it and blame you. Read the threads here...there are so many lovely, loving partners doing everything to "fix" and excuse the addict they love...it doesn't work.
He is lying about using, his job is in jeopardy, he's displaying irrational and controlling behavior...that's addiction.
You're clearly an intelligent person. Find a therapist who is familiar with codependency. You need to look out for yourself and your son first.
Best of luck to you...sending you a hug.
P.S. You describe your ex as being a "child"... maybe there's a pattern here? Maybe just coincidence, but I myself had an uncanny ability to find guys who had all the same problems my father does.