My recovery has been a lot of netflix, meditation, yoga, church, painting, reading, a lot of everything. Maybe things will be better when spring comes. February is when my "crazies" come out. I'm just bored with everything. I know I need to work on my shyness and lack of self esteem but I don't know how to even start. I beat myself down all day long. I don't know how to treat myself any different because this is all I've known.