I used to set my alarm clock for 3 in the morning so I could dispose of my empties in the neighborhood's church recycle bin... now looking back: that was absolutely insane.
Upon reflecting, I've come to realize that I got a thrill from hiding my addiction from others.
Like you, I think I got a sick thrill from hiding my addiction like living a double life up to the point where it started like having a second full time job.
Good going with being honest with your dad and getting rid of the empties
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