Not to sound selfish, but really, do you want to have her retire then have to just spend the rest of your days taking care of her while she spirals, because that will happen.
Once you speak to an attorney you realize it's not nearly as hard to separate things as you think it may be. I know for myself, after 15 years of being married, and 18 years together, it seemed like a huge hurdle to overcome to separate everything. It was pretty simple actually, I just needed an attorney's help.
You deserve to live a happy and sane life.