Moving Soon
Hi,
I took everyone's advice and called the police regarding the harassing telephone call from my ah.
I'm moving on Feb 17th. I'm sad about all this, but relived that I'll finally get my life back and feel safe. It's going to be huge undertaking to pack. I can't afford anyone to help me pack, can barely afford the movers.
This ordeal or I should say disease is so heartless. My ah has no intentions of quitting drinking.
He is happy in his own world. Is it possible my ah will never see that he has a problem ?? My ah feels we is right about everything, tells people what to do all the time, is an expert on everything, makes up stories, uses manipulation and intimidate to control people. I don't know if it's the disease or if he has something truely wrong. Like I said before, my ah is living in his own world and his reality isn't what is real.
Not sure why I'm going over this in my head, but can't seem to let it go. I feel like a failure, that I couldn't help him and we couldn't work it out.
I've done a lot of self reflection. I know I am accountable for a piece of this marriage. Always questioning what if ?, Sound have? Could have? Then I think would it have made a difference?
I know I'm overthinking a situation that should be so clearly evident as to what the outcome should be. I guess emotions are what make us humans and give us a piece of our humidity.
Well, I'll be packing today. Got free boxes and papers from the supermarket. I'm sure I'll have a few meltdowns today, but I'll just pick myself up and move forward. Thank you all for listening. I just think I need your strength and support today.