Hi Dee - it wasn't mandatory in the sense of "be there or be fired" but a lot of questions would have been asked if I had pulled out. Essentially, the only excuse that wouldn't be suspicious would be something urgent - personal or business.
Reflecting on it, I made a couple of mistakes. I was hungry when it started and the finger food didn't fill me without the usual empty wine calories I'd have. I didn't make time for exercise that day.
One thing went right - importantly a few colleagues know I'm not drinking and I'm on medical advice not to drink for a few months - which is true. I don't know if I needed that extra accountability or if my willpower would have been enough but it was good to have it.
Tonight I went to another cocktail event - this one I could have pulled out of and no-one would have said anything. I had a snack beforehand and made time for the gym. It was much easier - I didn't think about drinking at all. The conversations seemed less tiring. I wasn't hungry, I wasn't stressed and I could leave after an hour.
I have to say I think the hunger is potentially a big trigger - I didn't realise how hungry I was last night until I woke up this morning. I suspect after years of under-eating and over-drinking I don't know what a healthy day's worth of food looks like.
So maybe I have the beginnings of a plan for these things. I'm heartened after tonight's experience but still wary.