Thanks, dwtbd.
I appreciate both you and Hevyn giving me those glimmers of hope. Over the course of the last few years, I've often wondered if I'm somehow trying to replay my Dad's legacy? Which is weird because... I dunno. He sure didn't seem to be a happy man to me and I don't know why I'd be going for that. (Actually I think I do. ) Anyhow, it doesn't matter today. Maybe another day it will or maybe another day I will find that I've just let that go because I've let go of the behaviors and impulses so it really won't matter at all.
I asked middle daughter about the vodka today. She said she wasn't sure why she had kept it and then in the next breath asked if I'd purchased any more. I said, "No... Do you believe that I'm really doing this treatment thing?" She said she wasn't sure. So I'm going with the notion that she is keeping it to remind herself not to too comfie . And that's perfectly understandable.
Although it was a day off from work, I still needed to drive into the city for group. It was fine, but seemed like a lot of people were sort of off. Maybe that's normal after a weekend? The guy whose "keeping it real" attitude I like used over the weekend, but he still showed up. One of those Unfortunately but Fortunately stories, I guess? I'm sure I'll need to get used to people disappearing; just hope he isn't one. Well, that's silly - I hope none of them are one of those!
During group, we veered all over the place again, only more so. It seems that people have trouble staying on topic. This is going to be a challenge for me as we go along and the novelty wears off. The best way I can think of to handle it at the moment is as an exercise in not having control. As in, it's not the way I would (or do) run my meetings, but this isn't my workplace and I'm not the boss nor the expert, so maybe I can learn some tolerance and humility. (Maybe "on topic" is not the most important thing for this person today, What can I learn from what IS?)