Since I'm the only guy on this thread, I want to comment on this:
Cold shoulder this morning, no eye contact, one word answers. He is mad.
This is not the behavior of a healthy adult male. It is the behavior of a petulant, immature teenager. That being said, it doesn't surprise me. Never mind the fact that his addiction has taken ginormous toll on your marriage and you. Never mind the fact that you feel vulnerable and not safe with him in an intimate situation. It's all about him and what he wants. SR decorum precludes me from saying what I really think. Suffice to say when men pull this act on women, they should be shown the door.