understood.
Is it possible that you need some sort of acknowledgement from him that what occurred ... hurt you ?
Is it possible that you could ask him to 'cuddle' with you and not expect anything more until you are ready ? that things will happen when you are able to handle more ?
I felt that way when things had happened with my ex husband ... I needed to be able to say when, where, how much ... it was part of the trust issue. He wouldn't comply but I tried. And felt peaceful afterwards. You have a right to your own destiny. I needed mine to understand that he hurt me, deeply. Tho he was never able to give me that.