Originally Posted by
AnvilheadII 
what an insensitive selfish jerk. i mean i get it, nobody likes to be turned down , but we are grown ups now and that's how it goes sometimes. i'm sorry, you have EVERY RIGHT to say no. even to your husband.
I told him I'm sorry because I know it's hard when we haven't been together for over a year. I told him a lot has happened over the past year and I'm having trouble letting it go. I don't want to blame his relapse but it is part of my disconnect. He just got angry and started yelling I haven't put it one effort to rebuild our marriage. That he is putting in every effort to work on himself and I'm doing nothing. He doesn't accept the fact I have my recovery from codependency I'm working on. He days it shouldn't matter and I should be trying to get close to him. But I just can't bring myself to be close to him again.