Thank you!
He's always been a jealous sort of person, but the thing with having problems with my clothes is rather new. The last time he tried to sober up and we talked about it he claims it was because of our lack of intimacy at the time (which continues). Never mind the fact that it was his being either drunk/passed out/ hungover virtually every second we were in the same room ... it had to be that I was getting my needs met somewhere else. Hence my "new" way of dressing (also never mind the fact that these are clothes I've worn for years ...)
He has gotten verbally/emotionally abusive with me in the last few years, which was what eventually began these attempts to sober up the last year or so - I told him I'd had enough of him going off at me after drinking all night and wouldn't live like that anymore. The result has been that these rages have stopped, but now this issue is beginning. I just feel like I'm on a roller coaster.
I really feel like 2016 may be the year for us - either make or break. He's gotten a sponsor and is a week in, so I'm willing to see how this pans out - IF he can not take out his every bad day on me in the meantime. But, I am at the point where if this takes another dive, it will likely end with an ultimatum to seek rehab or I'm done. I've started putting money aside for the eventuality. This is likely adding to my difficulty dealing calmly these days; a big part of me really is "done" in many ways.
Being here has really helped me this last year, both in dealing with AH and with gaining the strength to take steps to protect myself in the event it becomes necessary. Thank you everyone at SR for being her!