I'm playing this game with my youngest daughter that she doesn't know we're playing yet. It goes like this:
"Daughter, will you please clean the kitchen today?"
"Mom, why do I have to clean other people's spills and dishes?"
"Daughter, because that is what living in a communal household is like, Please clean the kitchen. And also can you finish the laundry like you told me you would do yesterday?"
Morning comes, kitchen is not clean, so I clean it.
"Mom, I'm sorry that I didn't clean the kitchen before you got to it."
"Daughter, I appreciate your apology. Could you please finish the laundry?"
Afternoon comes, no laundry doing happening, so I do the laundry.
I'm going to see how long we can keep this up. I've tried punishing, being obnoxious, yelling, and who knows what all else? Oh drinking. None of these things seem to have made a difference.
So the game is: ask for one thing to be done once/day. If it is not done, I will do it. Either way, the house will be in better order, I will enjoy calmly carrying on (as opposed to crazily carrying on) and perhaps the girl will cave in to reasonable at some point. Perhaps.
So that's not really about drinking.
But it is.
Because drinking isn't the only way to ignore or disregard or minimize something that is causing me to be upset.