I understand. The reason I'm thinking of talking it over with the AVRT crowd is that they will point out that wondering why I'm not relieved at making this decision is AV- I just need to find an effective way to disregard the worry without dismissing it, if that makes any sense.
I just answered the poll about when people started drinking and I am in the majority - it was during my teens. And thinking about the sequencing, I just realized I've had it off all these years - there was a part I isolated from all of the others...
It's upsetting me right now, but I'm gonna think on it and try to come back to make a coherent and hopefully helpful (to me at least) statement.