My personal take on this type of behavior from sponsors in AA is that people who go in with childhood or other major trauma are sometimes hurt by step work done the way some sponsors do it.
You say you've worked through the steps mostly. Why not take some time without a sponsor? It's not a requirement. There is no magic spell that a sponsor is able to cast on you. Everything other than Step 5 can be done on your own, and you've already spent many years in meetings. I would go to the meeting with the best recovery, but then I wouldn't have a sponsor. Spend time with your HP/God. You have it within you to do the work - the work is generic. It is basic spiritual practice that is taught in nearly all spiritual disciplines. There isn't a special "key" that only sponsors have. You have all the tools. You were born with them.