[QUOTE=jessie65;5696648
It feels like another entity takes over my body, I just don't understand it. I don't want to drink, so how can I just suddenly change my mind??
[/QUOTE]
I relate to this 100%....I have always said I have 2 personalities....Me and the drunk. Me is sensible and responsible and DESPERATELY wants sobriety.....is DESPERATELY dedicated to sobriety.....then, all the sudden I pick up a drink. HOW....WHY!? (30 yrs of this craziness)
Turns out I don't have 2 personalities.....that 'other' personality is my addiction....(I've been reading about AVRT and it has described me perfectly...it may help you too)
I am once again trying to get sober and not let my addiction pick up a drink. I am on day 7 and been crying for the last 2 days....crying from exhaustion and frustration...which is crazy because before that I had 2 days of bliss.....but it's all expected....it's all better than being hungover and hating myself.....whatever it takes (again).
Hang in there....that's what I'm doing.
