Either way alcohol is doing you no favours, you drink because your depressed which then makes you even more unhappy, or you don't drink and sort out your depression.
The reality is still the same, alcohol is not helping, and for me alcohol simply creating more anxiety and more depression as it's a depressant.
Which ever way you cut it, alcohol is not a long term solution to anything.
I think your suffering from what most addicts suffer from, and that is impatience, life does not work off a series of switches, there are no quick fixes to anything, it's going to take time, and the sooner I accepted that this was going to be a journey the better I realised the task at hand!!