That's what alcohol and drug abuse IS.
Maybe check in and read the responses on your other threads Sourbaby.
Have you checked the meeting times and locations tomorrow? If you want to go to some meetings, then the only way to do that is get your coat and bag and get yourself TO one. This thing is going to take some action on your part. Noone can't go for you.
If it'll make you feel better and more committed to getting there, contact the helpline and they'll get a local AA member to call for a chat. They might even meet you outside the meeting so you don't have to walk in alone. People are there and they're holding out life bouys, but you have to grab one of them with both hands and hold on tight if you want to save yourself from that sea of despair you're drowning in.