Originally Posted by
Butterfly 
What makes me happy, my kids, my friends, feeling relaxed in my own home I don't really know what else!!
I'd suggest to focus on those things first, and add other things in once you feel like you have firm control on your boundaries. I've started dating now after taking time off to work on me, and I still remind myself daily to embrace what I am comfortable with and not mold myself to someone else's expectations.