Well first of all you haven't lost it! Maybe you finally have got it! :-) Sometimes it takes people longer to get with it. I found this is a fairly safe place to admit you're not perfect. Keep one thing in mind the more you drink and the more you slip the more you learn as you said. The dangerous part is that we are in deadly situations when we drink. Use your three drinks as a tool. Memorize how you feel right now and when you want to drink, remember how you reached out and how sane that was