Hi, trish, and welcome! I'm sorry for your pain, but it's one that's very familiar to most of us, and the good news is that you won't feel this way forever.
He's made it pretty darned clear, it seems to me, what his priorities are. It's kind of like his moving a girlfriend in and saying, hey, honey, meet our permanent new member of the family--if you can't accept that, we're doomed.
OK, so knowing that's where his head is at, are you OK with that? Sounds to me like you're not. Are you going to Al-Anon? I really, REALLY recommend it. You need to get your head clear so you can make good choices for what you want for yourself and your future.
Do you have kids? Do you work and have your own money? Those are factors that will impact your decisions.
We have an interesting thread going today that you might want to take a look at:
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...son-leave.html. Also, as Refiner suggested, read the stickies up top, and keep reading and posting. You're in the right place.