Originally Posted by
thomas11 
Hi TheRake, everything has pretty much been said. The bottom line is that at least temporarily you need to set some boundaries. Not a line in the sand...a brick wall. Give yourself 90 days to see what a sober life really feels like. I'm guessing the loneliness and emotional part of you is looking for a relationship and you believe there's a chance it might happen in a bar. After all, that's where a lot of people hang out and be social. I understand that. Personally, I would put ALL OF IT on the back-burner for now. The drinking will only get worse and ultimately you will end up in the worse case scenario, alone and a drunk. Hang in there. Best wishes.
Hey Thomas, it's funny you say that about the 90 days......I started an audio book this morning and one of the pieces of advice was to review it several times over 90 days....the audio book also references other books...and I said to myself....ok that's my first 90 day sober project.....90 days sober and get through the material in the book(s)........I kind of agree with concentrating on one day at a time....but the GhostFace fellow mentioned something usefull about goals......if you don't have an end date.....the goal ends up just becomeing a dream.....I think that works for me having an endgoal in mind......achieve the 90 days and then keep setting other periods of time markers......that been said I think if I get a good run at this......I can put it to bed for good......
No I don't think I'm looking for a relationship man. Probably the last thing that I need. I don't think it ever works, a man looking for a relationship....seems to repel them. But I do have a biological drive and need....and long dry periods can be hazardous to my health. I have tried to put it on the back burner....and then I start to ache and it consumes my thoughts and dreams.....
the loneliness is probably something that needs to be fixed from childhood. A relationship ain't going to fill that hole.